How Do You Define Happiness?

I ran a contest in "Your Daily Dose of Happiness" to see how people define happiness. I was stunned to discover that I am the only person who defines happiness as an extra helping of cheesecake.

There were other shockers, too.

We know that money can't buy happiness ... except, of course, when we are flat broke. But I figured several people would define happiness, at least in part, as a bulging bank vault or "financial freedom". Just three people cited money in their definitions of happiness.

I also figured many people would cite health as part of their definition of happiness, as in "health, wealth, and happiness". But only four people mentioned health.

No health? No wealth? How do people define happiness?

The top rated mention goes to family. It seems that we might be flat broke and deathly ill, but a loving family will make us happy just the same.

Altruism and kindness are also key. It seems we smile by making others smile. Isn't that nice? No health and no wealth. Just smile.

Faith scores big, too. This works out very well, because we can ask our loving family to pray for a speedy recovery and a big win in El Gordo next month (assuming we recover first).

What does this mean? It means the spammers have it all wrong. They keep sending us useless emails about making money.

A typical spam message says, "Get the insider secrets to making millions on the Internet. I will give you these valuable secrets for peanuts just because I love your smile so much. You could make $5,433 in the next hour if you act now. Hurry. Don't wait. This is the real thing. You can trust me. All the others are just scammers."

Instead, spammers should be sending offers like, "Get the insider secret to building a loving family on the Internet. I will give you these valuable secrets for peanuts (and a big virtual hug) just because I love your smile so much. You could love your kids, spouses, uncles, parents, pets ? anybody! ? in the next hour if you act now. Hurry. Don't wait. This is the real thing. You can trust me. All the others are just family planners."

Spammers also waste emails on replacing body parts we never had and enhancing body parts we could never have, when what we really want is to know God better.

Here is a typical spammer email: "Hair loss? We just released the miracle cure. Grow your hair back thicker than a wooly mammoth preparing for the next ice age. This is worth a gazillion dollars, but you get it free for just pennies a day. Give me your credit card number before midnight tonight. I can't afford to offer this price for long. Beware phony products that drip funny colors in your face or make hair grow in all the wrong places. This is the real thing!"

Instead, spammers should be saying: "Faithless? Book your luncheon with the Pope, dinner with the Dalai Lama and a one-on-one chat with Moses. Reserve your seat free for just a handful of pennies. Give me your credit card number before midnight tonight. Act now. I can't afford to offer this price for long. Beware phony reservations for meetings with Michael Jackson and other fake gods. This is the real thing!"

By the way, Mother Nature was also a part of many definitions of happiness. So take your family down by the river for a prayer. And if you can lend a helping hand to a chipmunk or a duck, you'll be the perfect definition of happiness.

About The Author

The author is David Leonhardt, The Happy Guy. To receive his column weekly in your inbox, sign up at http://TheHappyGuy.com/positive-thinking-free-ezine.html . For how others define happiness: http://TheHappyGuy.com/define-happiness.html. Visit his home page at http://TheHappyGuy.com.

Where do we Find True and Lasting Happiness?

For the longest time I was convinced that I was not happy unless I had a partner to share my life with. I just knew that having someone to share glorious sunrises and romantic sunsets would make me happy. I even came close to marrying someone who made me feel as if I was the happiest person on the face of the earth only to find out that it was not actually him that made me happy. This is the mistake most all of us make when we are dating and even more so when we have been married and have become accustomed to having someone around all the time then suddenly we are thrust back into this crazy dating world that has changed so much since we were gone that we need to go to Dating College to get educated and learn the lingo not to mention the new rules to even be a player in the game. OK, so you think you know the answers, what makes you happy, what will keep you happy and that special something that will attract you and keep you attracted? I think you are going to be surprised at what I have to say.

The greatest lesson I have learned if I have learned anything in my dating trials and tribulations is that I am the only person on this earth that is responsible for my happiness. The only place that happiness lives forever, with or without a partner is within you. You have the power to create and maintain your own happiness. Love is great to have and share, but in order to share what you have to offer, you must first find that happiness within yourself and the person that sees that happiness in you will want to be part of that happiness. So you see, the search and the quest for that fulfillment is endless as long as you choose not to look inside yourself.

Enjoy the journey, experience what life has to offer, always keeping your happiness in focus, first and foremost. YOU, are the reason for your happiness, let it shine, share it with the world and you will receive that happiness back in your heart ten fold.

Linda Reeves is an advice columnist for http://www.cupidsblackbook.com she is 47 years old and lives in the American Midwest.

Happiness. Its Between Our Ears!

Happiness is something we all seek, yet few of us find

-Some search for it an acquiring material possessions

-Some search for it in experiencing pleasant sensations

-Some search for it in seeking the approval of others

-Some search for it in the exercising of power

-Some search for it in the love of money

-Some search for it in the quest for success

Yes, Happiness is something we all seek, and yet for most it is something that comes, then slips away, to be always just out of reach. Why? Is life really unfair? Aren't we meant to be happy? Are we being punished?

The interesting thing is that all these ways that people search for happiness, and the questions they ask when they don't find it, have one thing in common.

They are all OUTSIDE ourselves. Sadly, most people are looking in the wrong places, and asking the wrong questions.

The truth is that Happiness is something that comes from within us. One night, trying to express my thoughts, I sat and wrote these words...

Happiness

We'll never find true Happiness
In more and bigger Things,
In pleasures sought outside ourselves;
In money, cars or rings

For Happiness is a state of mind-
We can opt for happy years,
When we take control of our Attitude,
And the thoughts between our ears.

I know, as a poet I make a good athlete! But if my words are inadequate to convey the meaning, it is no less important. Read, savor and write down, these beautiful words from Charles Spurgeon.

"It is not how much we have, But how much we enjoy, That makes happiness."

John Payne has lived an interesting life, and overcome many problems with a common sense, positive attitude and joy for life.

He is the Founder of the fast-growing business, Enviro-Friendly Products.

Creating Happiness

Whatever we want in life, a partner, more money, good health, a fulfilling career, or enlightenment, it all comes down to the same thing: behind all the wishes, behind all the desires, and beyond every symbol, we want to feel happy. After all, if we feel completely happy, what more do we need? And if we don't feel happy, there is not a relationship or career that can satisfy us.

All men and women want to find happiness, but you don't find happiness anymore than an artist finds a beautiful statue; he or she sculpts it from a shapeless stone. A musician doesn't find an intricate melody; he or she composes it from the eight note scale.

Happiness is not an acquisition, it's a skill. We don't experience happiness because of something that we're getting, like a raise or money. We experience happiness because of how we're living. For example, having a tennis racket doesn't make you a good tennis player, learning how to play tennis does. Having material things doesn't make you happy; living each moment of the day to the fullest does. Happiness is living in the present moment. You experience happiness when you know exactly where you are in your life at a given moment, and experience that moment to the fullest.

Getting the things you want in life won't make you happy unless you know how to enjoy every moment. For example, if you don't know how to enjoy five hundred dollars, you will not enjoy five thousand dollars when you get it, or even five hundred thousand dollars. If you can't enjoy taking a walk in your neighborhood, and you travel to Hawaii, Paris, or Rome, you won't be any happier there either. Now I'm not saying having money or taking more trips doesn't make your life easier or more fun. It does. But those things don't make you deeply happy because they can't. Only enjoying life's real moments can.

If we look closely at our lives, most of us don't feel very happy much of the time because we focus our attention on precisely the things that make us feel bad, our problems, and the issues we have in our personal and business lives. Most of us find happiness elusive because we aren't exactly sure what it looks like. Like a rainbow, it appears before us at times, but it's always temporary.

Working toward material success, expanded awareness, and love helps to make our lives exciting and meaningful. Yet, the urge to find happiness may be our deepest human drive. Despite our achievement and successes, many of us have a sense that something is still missing in our life. And it is this feeling that causes us to continue to search for happiness.

Wanting to grow, expand, explore, and improve are natural human drives. But many of us think that when we find what we're looking for, it will make us happy. Only to find that it doesn't. And when we keep trying to find happiness it only serves to reinforce our dilemma of never being able to find it. The more we search for happiness, the more it reflects our resistance or avoidance of life right now. The past is behind us and the future has yet to come, what we have is now. We all have the choice to be happy now or never.

Most of our stress and suffering in life comes from our mind's resistance to what is. Happiness isn't about getting what we want as much as wanting what we get. If our lives meet our basic needs for clothing, food, and shelter, then any unhappiness you feel comes from your mind's resistance. If you take this same resistant mind with you into the future, this unhappiness will remain with you no matter how delightful your external circumstances are.

I don't mean to imply that the discipline of creating happiness is easy. It's not. And any process of learning involves mistakes and failures; but it gets easier over time.

Happy people create happiness. It's the most contagious energy on earth. But, you can't pretend to be happy or engage in denial or repression. If you do, you'll only be fooling yourself. When you create happiness, you fully acknowledge and honor whatever emotions are passing through. You watch them like clouds passing by, but you focus your attention on the sunshine above the clouds. By doing this, you are intentionally creating a space of unconditional happiness. And this is much different from just saying "I'm happy" or bravely pretending to be happy. It's the only happiness that is not dependent on outside circumstances.

If I could give you a formula for happiness, it would be: Become fully conscious of what you're doing, perceiving, or experiencing in a given moment. Once you're conscious of it, allow yourself to break through that illusion of separation and connect with the person, thing, or feeling. Then surrender totally into that connection and experience. Now you should be in tune with and actually experiencing the moment. Our lives are made up of a succession of moments that occur all the time. It's up to us to enjoy them.

For example, let's say you're walking up a mountain that overlooks the ocean. You stop for moment and look out at the beautiful vista, feeling the fresh air, and for a second you feel at one with everything, you have this kind of high feeling. That's a real moment of happiness in your life.

You deserve to have all the happiness that life has to offer. Make the most out of each moment in your life and enjoy it. Don't wait for happiness to come to you. Create it yourself with each moment. You can become the magician by creating happy experiences whenever and wherever you want.

Copyright(c)2004 by Joe Love and JLM & Associates,Inc. All rights reserved worldwide.

Joe Love draws on his 25 years of experience helping both individuals and companies build their businesses, increase profits, and achieve total success. A former ad agency executive and marketing consultant, Joe's work in personal development focuses on helping his clients identify hidden marketable assets that create windfall opportunities and profits, as well as sound personal happiness and peace.

Reach Joe at: joe@jlmandassociates.com

Read more articles and newsletters at: http://www.jlmandassociates.com

Be Happy, Join The Wednesday Worry Club

Of all the people who know me, no one would say I am afflicted with worryitis. They may say other things about me, which may or may not be true, but that's another story.

If you ask me, and nobody has, worry is just a waste of time that could be used more profitably. Every hour of worry takes away from an hour of happiness. There is absolutely no "rhyme or reason" to spend one moment worrying.

Actually, there is a little "rhyme," (it sounds more like rap than anything else), but I assure you there is absolutely no reason for it.

A friend has a cute motto he likes to call to mind; "Why worry when you can pray," which makes perfectly good sense. If we would spend time we would use to worry and pray, we would discover little to unduly concern us.

Very little in life causes me to agonize or be anxious. I have better use of my time than wasting it in such a useless employment carrying no benefits or retirement.

This has not always been the case with me. Once, and not too long ago, I worried about everything. You name it, and I've worried about. My worry list was longer than the list of promises of a politician running for re-election.

Then I worried about missing something I should be worrying about, which was my Waterloo, and you know what happens when you miss the loo.

This is not to say I don't have a worry in the world. There is the war in Iraq; the economy; and trying to remember what my wife asked me to bring home from the store tonight. If I'm not careful, I could easily slip back into those gala days filled with worry.

That was then, this is now. A few years back someone introduced me to a marvelous strategy dealing with worry. Since then, my worrying time has been cut to a bare minimum. Because I'm the kind of person I am, I want to pass this scheme along to my friends: both of you.

I call the plan, "The Wednesday Worry Club." I simply referred to it as the WWC.

Very simply, anything that comes my way in the category of worrying, is jotted down on a 3x5 card, which is then placed in a special box called, "The Wednesday Worry Club Box." The item on the card is forgotten as I drop it into the box. Every Wednesday I open up the box and go through the cards.

The cards are color-coded for convenience. Red cards are for serious items; green cards are for financial worries; blue cards are for items not needing immediate attention; and yellow cards are for issues with the Gracious Mistress of the Parsonage (the bulk of cards in the box are yellow - but you didn't hear it from me).

The effect is simplifying my life and freeing up significant time previously occupied with worrying. I cannot tell you how this has enriched my life and I am anxious for you to experience the benefits of the WWC.

On Wednesday afternoon when I open the box, the cards fall into three categories.

One: Issues that are too late to do anything about. This is my favorite category. The theory being if you postpone anything long enough it will be too late to do anything about it. Many of the red cards fall into this area.

The interesting thing is, when the item is first put on the red card and placed in the box it seems to be extremely urgent, as though something needed to be done right away. However, placing it in the box and forgetting about it until Wednesday takes away the thorn of urgency.

Two: Issues that are no longer urgent, important, or needing any attention at all. This, too, is a favorite category. Too often a certain person in our house, (I'll mention no names), insists that a thing needs immediate attention. However, some things postponed long enough take care of themselves.

Most issues, if left alone, will work themselves out without any outside help. And I consider myself outside help. The further outside, the more comfortable I feel.

Three: The final category, issues that can be postponed until next week. Many of these are green cards. As I go through the cards, regardless of their color, I try to postpone as many as I can.

There is a finesse in this aspect of the WWC. It takes a long time to develop expertise in the area of postponement.

The key to all of this, of course, is to carry about on your person at all times enough colored cards. It is a sad day when I run out of cards, usually the yellow cards.

Then a thought emerged in the back recesses of my mind. How many trees have been used to produce all these 3x5 cards I've been using. Immediately, I brought out a fresh red card and made a notation. I cannot wait until Wednesday to find out how this works out.

Of course, there is a better way than the WWC. David, that marvelous Shepherd Psalmist of the Lord wrote, "Trust in the LORD with all thine heart; and lean not unto thine own understanding. In all thy ways acknowledge him, and he shall direct thy paths." (Proverbs 3:5-6 KJV.)

Instead of committing my anxious thoughts to cards, I could "Commit thy way unto the LORD; trust also in him; and he shall bring it to pass." (Psalms 37:5 KJV).

Recently, the WWC has given way to the WNPM (Wednesday Night Prayer Meeting).

Rev. James L. Snyder is an award winning author and popular columnist living in Ocala, FL with his wife Martha.

http://www.jamessnyderministries.com http://www.godspenman.com

14 Habits For A Happier You and I

Many people exercise, play sports, or know someone who does. Having done so almost my entire life, I have a few pearls of wisdom. To gain an advantage, focus on a full body workout. In sports your base (waist down) are more important than your upper body except the mind and heart. It will bring more life to your conversations and rejuvenate your outlook.

I met a 74 year old man playing full court basketball. He was a teammate of Oscar Robertson (The Big O) on the Cincinnati Royals. He's a joy to watch because of his subtle technique and confidence. He has a team called "Man Up". In an effort to "One Up You", let me know how the following works for you.

If you would like to read the definitive book on basketball, I encourage you to check out The Art of Basketball by Oscar Robertson (The Big O). Be sure to interpret the words on the pages correctly and add your touch. Here's wishing you a lifetime of swishes and assists.

I'm sure for those who play other sports there is a book. Use your imagination to visually practice the techniques. Try blocking 30 minutes of time, identify the skill(s), count the number of mental repetitions, and sets. Then, try it on the field of play. I think you will like the results. Be sure to lead a balanced life.

Good sportsmanship has its privileges. I recently attended a high school basketball game and am disgusted at the behavior of a few. It must be stopped because it sends the wrong message. Additionally, realize it is about winning the game. A negative habit will only hinder your progress as you progress to the next level and beyond. Be in control.

1. Listen to your body and check with your physician before starting an exercise program

2. Do a variety of exercises

3. Play a sport

4. If a body part hurts, don't aggravate it & seek medical attention

5. During the exercise, mentally focus on the body part you're exercising

6. At least two genuine smiles while resting during an hour workout

7. Vary cardio routines including length of time, day, and speed

8. Have at least one brief conversation before or during workout

9. Compete with a sub-goal in mind (repetition required before going to the next level(s)) and reaching a goal

10. Less is more if done correctly

11. Drink eight glasses of water a day ?. Start the day with one glass & drink less with meals ?. Don't drink it all at once

12. Eat a variety of nourishing foods (include some fruit, one walnut, one pecan, two almonds)

13. Drink no more than 1.5 cups of your favorite sport drink after exercise

14. Don't eat within two hours of exercising for optimal stomach strength

Raju Gavurla, President of LiiiVEN?, Inc. is a Motivational Speaker and Business Development & Growth Consultant. Client Modular Approach programs on motivation, communication, and mental health assist you in achieving your professional/personal goals. Contact him at 404.918.7366, e-mail raju.gavurla@liiiven.com or visit http://www.liiiven.com. Copyright 2003-2005 LiiiVEN?, All rights reserved. Duplication whole or in part must include this entire attribution.

Health and Medical Advice on the Internet: Use it Wisely to Overcome Illness and Find More Happiness

I've got a bit of a problem with depression and anxiety. I've been tackling these problems for several years without the use of modern medicine. Tai Chi, meditation, martial arts (exercise), and positive interaction with other people seem to keep a lid on my illnesses most of the time. I don't like the idea of medication's side effects, and I don't believe the answers in life are often found in the easy path (E.G. taking a pill), but rather on the hard path of effort and determination. This is not to say that I don't feel medicine is not effective, not at all, I just feel all the options should be looked at before making big decisions to do with one's health.

Health of body and mind has always been one of the most important issues in life for us humans. Seeing a doctor is usually the best option when one comes down with an illness or ailment, but people have always tried alternative routes to recovery: E. G. the 'home doctor' books of old. Maybe you don't like sitting in a room waiting with a bunch of other sick people-you might catch something there! You could be housebound, or maybe you feel like hearing several opinions as you've found past experiences with some doctors have been tainted by poor judgments. Well, the Internet is here with a multitude of options to help you get better.

Medical advice and data abounds on this household tool in the form of self-help sites, searchable medical encyclopedias, support groups, live chats with doctors, and you can even have professional consultations on-line (for a fee). My advice is to just be wary of the type of language that the site is expressing. Many sites will have extensive lists telling you of all the symptoms in the Universe: everybody on Earth could be construed as being ill in some way! This can cause people with a propensity for hypochondria to start diagnosing themselves with all sorts of diseases. In my case, reading about all the symptoms of depression actually made me feel more depressed as it made me focus on my weaknesses (without too many optimistic perspectives or treatments expressed on some sites).

Look for sites that look at things in a positive light. Maybe search out some alternative therapies as well so you can get all the possible different approaches that can be taken to tackle your illness. Some websites can be very helpful with interactive features like 'Ask the doctor", on-line questionnaires, and question and answer archives that give you an idea of what others have asked and the solutions they were presented with. There is heaps of information on both prescription and over-the counter medicines so you can make your choices in an informed manner. You can often find information specific to groups, like children, the elderly, men and women.

Just remember your body is your temple and you must be wary of many variables not often foretold in literature. Beware of medicines from other countries as they may be different or have different names. Keep in mind only you know your personal history, all people are different, and always get several opinions. Watch out for sites with grandiose claims as miracles come from higher powers and not from companies who might just want to get rich quick!

I do acknowledge the fitness and diet sites as being very useful as well. You can devise your own fitness plan derived from lifestyle information, and forums and newsgroups give you many opinions on which road to take. You can have your diet analyzed by on-line trainers, some of which send free newsletters and even send you emails of encouragement to help you towards your goal.

So, there's a whole new world of on-line health advice and information for humanity to access right from home. Get all your options and remember your attitude is often the first real step to overcoming physical, mental, and spiritual adversity!

About The Author

Jesse S. Somer - M6.Net - http://www.m6.net

Jesse S. Somer is a simple human hoping to show others like him about the positive vibe the Internet is creating in people all over the world.

priyankaa@m6.net